Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Silence.

I told you I don't want to see you. I break up with boyfriend.  I don't need him. I don't need no one. Not you. I don't trust you. I don't trust men. Just joy, now. Leave.
What the Fuck did I do. I didn't Fuck you and s ed nd picture all over Asia. I didn't make you clean my home, So I can share bed with a younger boy. I just be nice to you. Good to you. Fare with you.
A lone tear splashes the counter. Snot forms on nostrils.
A Kleenex. That's it. You wipe the shitty nose. The snot is yours. 
I'm sorry I insult you. I sorry I no sex. It was to soon. 
Wait . 
I'm ready, now.? 
Wait. The fall be better. I will only hurt you. I'm not ready for this. Everyone only stays two months. Wait for me.
Why do you hate me.? Why hate friendship? What the Fuck are you so scared off? You can't say anything to scare me, away. I am the dark dirty street. Don't push me away. Please?
Leave.
No.
Go. I'm no good.
No. Lets Fuck.
No.
Yes. You won't deny me then.
No 
Yes.We Fuck tonight. 
No. And you mention it again I never talk again.
Tonight I worship you. Tonight I give me to your need.
Stop. You won't like what happens.
Let's fuck now. Here. On the counter with the freeze dried squid.
Shut-up.
Why? You getting horny? Your little sex get hard?
Dont talk about it. I told you before no mention it.
Fuck you. I owe you nothing. I can say what I want.
Silence.
Am I not FAT Enough?
Silence 
Am I not mean enough?
Silence
Do you need me to just take it?
Silence.
What are you so fucking afraid of? Everything you have ever said is a lie? I fell in love with a lie.
Silence.
C'mon, quit playing this fucking game.
Silence. Walking to the back of the store. Moving bags of rice. looking at the ground. Crying.
Why are you crying? Im the one who is being treated like shit?
Silence.
Standing where the rice goes. Make sure you call the fat pedophile tonight to fuck you like a little boy. Suck your thumb and then go get ice cream in his nice big car.
Silence.
I'm sorry that was mean. I dont want to hurt you. I cant help it.
Silence.
Alright fuck it.
I have been hurt twice. and I dont deserve it. So I need to feel better, so I chose to hurt you. Leave. Dont come back. I dont like you no more. I dont trust you.
He bends over to grab rice. I grab his shirt. I wipe my eyes and nose on his chest. there is a line of snot connecting us. Call me when you fucking grow up?
Silence.
For real. I love you.
Silence.
I start to leave. I turn out throw my candy at him. He just stands there. Expressionless.
I think now I know his secret. I still love him, but if I am right I can never really LOVE him.
Silence.

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